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1. Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:18 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

   Its morbin time

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:02 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     These murder police have found some CCTV footage of Lucien using his superpowers. The footage includes the weird batsmoke, so I guess that means in the film, it’s real. It’s not just an effect for the audience.

     The detectives opine: "That’s not the Doctor." ah haw haw, since they’re looking at Matt Smith, who played The Doctor.

     "It’s what these bloodsuckers do. They multiply."

     Santa Claes 🇸🇪🇭🇰🎅 likes this.
   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:03 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Which means of course they kiss.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:04 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "How does it feel," she asks, pausing dramatically, "when you’re on red?"

     That’s not a thing. Who wrote this?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:04 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     There’s a lot of low talking and moody shots. They talk on the roof, absolutely no chemistry whatsoever between them.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:05 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Cat scratches the doctor, who drips some blood on the floor, making Morby completely horny for platelets.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:06 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Cops are breaking down the door to Dr. Bancroft’s house. One of them starts shaking the litterbox back and forth while repeatedly wailing "heeeeeeeere kitty kitty."

     "Cat’s gone," he states, based on the litterbox containing no cat shit, "And she’s probably gone along with it."

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:06 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Cut to Morbius typing as the camera pans by. A cat meow on the soundtrack tells us he’s with Bancroft.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:07 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "You wouldn’t happen to know where he is?"

     "I wouldn’t lie to you, Milo," she lies.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:07 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Why is the lab a crime scene? Because they arrested Morbaby? Do other people work in this lab? Are they concerned that it has a glass cylinder of bats who have been going absolutely apeshit flying erratically for several days continuously?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:08 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Dr. Bronner is visiting the lab, which has crime scene tape up. But who’s this? Lucien!

     This scene is Tense, so we’re back to shaky handheld camera.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:09 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The guy the lady Lucien is hitting on is with is none too happy about what’s going on.

     Lucien fucks off rather than murder everyone in da club. Whatta guy.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:09 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now he’s perched gargoyle-style, midway up a tall building, looking for victims. Down he jumps, with more weirdass smoke trailing behind him.

     It’s like they overbudgeted CG and instead of putting the funds towards something else, said "just go wild."

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:10 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien is ordering an expensive drink from an impressively bearded bartender, before hitting on a woman completely unprepared for what "can I eat you out" entails.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:11 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Okay, so while he can’t dance by any objective measure, he’s supposedly had severe mobility issues and required a cane. So these are actually much better dance moves than I’d expect from someone who cann’t walk without assistance. Is this some mysterious bat-dancing power? Can bats dance?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:11 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien throws a comb over his shoulder. You’re gonna have to pick that up, dude.

     I’m not even sure where Lucien is. It’s opulent, and I don’t recall seeing this location before.

     He poses to make a vampire-faced menacing expression, while wearing a tie made of the exact same materiel of his shirt, which has one of the collars sticking up for no reason. All that CG on his face, and they couldn’t fix the collar? Cheapskates.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:12 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbie is dismantling a large-format printere now. And pulling PCBs out of a rack. And stacking gears and things to make a crude centrifuge.

     Smash cut back to Lucien, who is very smug, shirtless, and still has no idea how to dance. There more choo-choo.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:13 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Just leave the science-y stuff and that bag of spicy Cheetos."

     They’re Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, and you Do Not Disrespect them in this house.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:13 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbub gives an anatomy lesson as he breaks the bones in this guy’s hand.

     "Who are you!?"

     "Me? I. Am. Venom."

     He’s having a real hard time making up his mind about what comic book character he is.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:14 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Okay, hold up, hahaha. I have just understood what’s happening.

     The counterfeiting hooligans were happy about how they got new chemicals that improved their counterfeit ink -- even though they fail the currency testing pen thing instantly. Which is a problem no amount of great ink will solve.

     And they mention going to a lab. Morbo wants the lab to synthesize... a cure? something? I guess a counterfeit ink lab is as good as a DNA-resequencing medical one for that.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:15 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Is the counterfeiting ring HQ in an abandoned mall? It seems so!

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:15 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbo walking down some stairs into a wrecked mall with a thug at a computer all like "wheres the zumiez"

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:16 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And now he’s stealing blood from some EMTs. Classy.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:16 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     I have no idea why he didn’t just follow the counterfeiting hooligans, other than the stop for blood allows him to use his weird-eyed bat-powers to locate them.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:17 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbatman super-overhears some local hooligans pressing the cashier into their counterfeiting scheme. He’s gonna fuck them up and drink their blood, probably.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:18 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Detective makes his way out the back, but Bronner is too smart. She got on a bus. A bus so special that it not only has a paper with a story about Morbz on the front page, but he’s actually sitting! right! behind her!

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:18 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "You shouldn’t be here."

     "I didn’t kill nurse Sutton, or the police." No mention of the eight guys on the ship. What happens in international waters, stays in international waters.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:19 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien doing a good Sickos impression as he ogles a woman (Dr. Bancroft?) through her apartment window.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:19 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And now she’s on the street, seeming to know she’s being followed, eveno though nothing really gets shown. She ducks into a convenience store and runs out the back as the frame shakes like the camera operator’s having a seizure. Then one of the detectives walks in! It was he who was tracking her.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:20 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The two detectives are on-scene at the sextuple subway cop homicide, and they don’t seem thrilled. Shoulda done that murdering in international waters, Lucien!

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:21 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbatman is now having a child-sticking-their-hand-out-the-car-window moment with the wind in the subway, which inexplicably ripply and visible and makes his hand smoke(?) as it blows by.

     Lucien is running full-tilt directly at him, shedding ropy strands of smoke-like... stuff.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:21 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     lmfao, what?! Morbygames is bat-flying right in front of the train. I’m pretty sure physics doesn’t work that way at all.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:22 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And in case you have never seen a movie before, the Foley people were kind enough to put some train horns into the soundtrack. And you can see the lights of one rounding the bend. Daniel Espinosa really hitting you over the head with this one.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:23 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Oh look, a couple of beat cops decide to intervene. Lucien fucks them up then does a smoky bullet time move to kill the three that came for backup. Then does some kind of white guy choo-choo train dance move he seems inordinately proud of, even though it is possibly the whitest thing I have ever seen, and I’m a white guy. It’s just awful, but also the funniest moment in the film thus far.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:23 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien monologues as Morbuddy walks away. And now it’s time for more weird smoke batpower fighting. Since this is in a subway, you know someone’s gonna get completely wrecked by a train.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:24 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbub is dead-set on fixing his mistake, but Lucien is amped up to get vamped up.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:25 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And now it’s time for a batchase/batfight in the subway.

     Did I mention that when they use their batpowers, they emit some kind of CGI smoke effect? Because they do. But whereas it was black, initially, it’s now the same orange as Morbussy’s prison jumpsuit. Why? I have no idea.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:25 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Woooo! We’ve evolved!" says vampire Lucien, after getting bodyslammed down an escalator.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:26 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Milo, you have to stop." Stop what? Being a vampire? You haven’t cured that yet.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:27 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien fucks up a bodega owner for insulting Morbius, who he left to rot in prison moments before.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:27 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbius uses his Batman powers to echolocate Lucien and track him down.

     And, oh, okay, Lucien killed the nurse. "You know what it’s like the first time."

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:28 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien is convinced of Morby’s innocence. Morby is unconvinced. Lucien smuggled in a bag of blood for Morbucko. What a guy.

     Then Lucien swigs from a flask as he walks out.... without his cane! He secretly, uh, found the syringes of bat DNA? And knew what they were, and how to use them, and injected himself in his own spine? ooohhhkay

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:28 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbucko is not happy. He ineffectually throws Lucien’s cane, then shotguns another bag of blood and goes full vampire mode before destroying the wall of his cell and jumping into the night and Spiderman leaping around the cityscape.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:29 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Maybe I blacked out."

     really

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:30 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Your lawyer’s here." and Lucien walks in.

     Pretty sure you can’t just say "I’m a lawyer" and walk into a prison. Even if you did put on a suit.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:30 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "They’re charging me with murder."

     And just because he murdered nine people. The System, amirite?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:31 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The flatfoots, fed up with his comic references, fuck off.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:32 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The flatfoots don’t care about the mercs, but are very upset about the nurse, who was a single mother of twins.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:32 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby pleads for some blood, but it’s in evidence. He might eat someone in a minute here.

     "I’m starting to get hungry. And you don’t wanna see me when I’m hungry."

     lmao, just 100% clumsily ripping off the memeiest line of The Hulk.

     But, same, tbh

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:33 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "I got a problem."

     - The guy in prison for brutally murdering nine innocent people, about his eating schedule.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:33 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The flatfoots come to interrogate, bringing some holy water along with them. And a blood-soaked origami bat. Oops!

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:34 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     They try to arrest him, so now it’s time for superpowers. Morby bat-leaps up a stairwell to the roof, where he loses the blood and is nearly blown off the edge.

     Now he’s in jail, where the kitchen is presumably not in the habit of preparing meals of human blood. That’s gonna be a problem for The Batman here.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:35 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     They have one of those Movie Conversations where the cops know he knows they know, but can’t prove it, sot they dance around and infer things.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:35 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     But, uh-oh! The hospital is being locked down because of the nurse. Don’t shit where you eat, Morbussy.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:36 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby goes to gawk at the people gawking at his latest victim. He works here, I guess? Nobody notices that instead of being sickly and needing two crutches, he’s buff and able-bodied.

     He goes back up to his lab and packs up all his True Blood in a backpack, walks out pretending(?) to use crutches and with his hoodie over his head.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:36 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     But, surprise! The flatfoots are onto him! They’re waiting in the lobby. Sure would have been a good time to use that echolocation, or superhuman high jumping, or remote listening, or any of those other bat superpowers instead of limping out the front door without a clue.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:37 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby goes to visit the child he had put in a coma, and uses his bat superpowers to overhear distant conversations; the nurse he murdered has been discovered.

     I guess nobody noticed the corpse in the hallway for hours, but someone immediately notes "Looks like all the blood was drained from her body." Because they can obviously tell that just from looking at a slumped figure.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:38 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Dr. Bancroft claims ignorance, and the flatfoots hit the bricks.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:38 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now a nurse with big lesbian energy is looking at some x-rays and walking through a dark hall. The lights start flickering and she says "Hello" several times before speedwalking away, then running for the lightswitch. Surprise! Nothing.

     But wait, it’s double surprise! It’s Morbius, drinking her blood.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:39 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Ah, we’re doing the thing where the vampire story exists in a world where Dracula was never published, so everyone is very confused by the fang marks on the necks of the victims drained of blood.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:40 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "We also noticed that their blood was... What do you call it?" "Exanguinated. I looked it up."

     Must not have looked too hard, since "exanguinated" means to be drained of blood. So their blood was drained of blood. Top notch work fellas, I’m sure you’ll solve this octo-homicide easily.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:40 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Also, shouldn’t a homicide detective know what exanguination is without needing to look it up?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:41 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien demands the cure, Morby refuses it. "It’s a curse."

     It’s a testament to the direction here that Matt Smith, who is actually British, has one of the worst sounding British accents I’ve ever heard.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:41 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby gives Lucien a pointy-teethed "I said get out!"

     The cops, still seemingly unaware that all those murders were legal, visit Dr. Bancroft (Morby’s lady friend assistant) to see if she can shed any light on the situation.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:42 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien gonna get his blood drank I’m pretty sure.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:43 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien is hobbling up to Morby’s lab, find him trapped behind some glass doors(? (wall (?))). Morby writes "BLOOD" on the glass, in blood. meta as hell.

     If he needs blood, why waste it writing blood in blood?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:43 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien gives Morby a bag of blood, which he shotguns.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:44 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "They would tear anyone else apart, but they welcome me. Like a brother."

     Spoken from inside the glass cylinder full of bats.

     And he can echolocate.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:44 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     So Morby drank his artificial blood, but he’s building up a tolerance. Coming around to needing to murder some more.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:45 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He walks into the Bat Cylinder. "I’ve become something... different."

     yeah dude, you went full Voldemort face there

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:46 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "For the first time in my entire life, I feel good."

     - Guy who brutally murdered eight guys and drank their blood less than 24 hours ago.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:46 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He has some kind of bat/vampire super powers. "I have the constitution of an Olympic athlete."

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:47 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby infiltrates the hospital to apologize to his lady doctor friend. Then furtively returns to his bat-infested lab. The treatment must be wearing off, since he’s stumbling all over the place.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:47 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He enters a freezer full of blood bags and starts straight up guzzling from one. And setting his watch to figure out how often he needs to drink more.

     But I thought he invented artificial blood. Why not drink some of that?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:48 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien is watching the news about Morby’s cargo ship with dismay, as Dr. Nicholas walks in.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:49 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Pausing this to read to the kids. More in a bit.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:49 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Waitaminute, if this is set in one of the Spiderman universes, how the fuck come Morby turned himself into literally the batman!?????????

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:50 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     It was Morby escaping. The ship is now swarmed by cops who don’t seem to realize that the ship was in international waters, where it’s 100% legal to murder eight mercenaries. Undeterred, they press on with the investigation.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:51 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He doesn’t remember murdering all those people, watches some surveilance video and pukes watching himself do it. Then calls mayday, since there’s nobody to pilot the ship.

     Which, by the way, is a /massive/ cargo ship or something. Hugely larger than is reasonable, but I guess if you have to put a whole lab on it, you gotta go big or go home.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:51 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Something gets tossed overboard, unclear if it’s Morby swimming away, or getting rid of the bodies.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:52 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby wakes up feeling, possibly, some regret. It might be due to slaughtering a whole ship full of prople, or it might be that his fingernails are pretty fucked-up looking after the bat DNA cocktail.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:52 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He’s inexplicably buff now, though, and the vampire face he was making is gone. He can walk.

     Well, I’d call that a success! Let’s treat everyone.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:53 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     A half dozen or so machine-gun wielding goons don’t stand a chance against this murderous bat-human hybrid.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:54 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Vampire Morby really doesn’t like the klaxon, he starts totally wrecking the room they locked him in.

     Oh boy, a bullet time fight scene.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:54 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby is upset that the goons knocked his lady doctor friend unconscious, starts wilding out on the ship. The goons indiscriminately spray gunfire.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:55 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Uh-oh, Morby has vanished and the computers are flashing WARNING

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:55 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He’s hanging from the ceiling and has some sharp teeth. He takes a chest full of automatic weapons fire and devours the goon.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:56 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And because we need More Drama, something is wrong with the ship and one of the crew goes to check.

     He walks in on the little science experiment with a gun.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:57 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby getting hooked up to machines. He has made an origami bat.

     His assistant(?) injects the bat DNA into his spine with a wicked-looking needle.

     Told ya.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:57 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby doesn’t look so hot. Now he’s vibrating like he’s strapped to a Magic Fingers bed instead of a ... medical torture chair?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:58 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     AND THATS A SHAME

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:59 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now they are on a ship sailing into "international waters" so Johnny Law doesn’t come and interrupt their bat-mouse-human DNA experimentation.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:06:59 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     They have brought an entire lab to splice human and bat DNA together on the boat, rather than create it ahead of time and stick it in a syringe.

     I’m just guessing on the syrings, but you know it’s gonna be in a syringe. Nobody ever makes a movie where you take bat DNA in a suppository.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:00 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     It is impossible to overstate how utterly ludicrous it is to see these two guys fake hobble around New York in a crowd.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:00 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now they’re in Central Park, and Morby mentions how he’s very close to a cure, but it’s unethical, illegal, expensive, and dangerous. But they don’t have much time left, so they’re going to do it.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:01 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Okay, so Lucien is also called Milo and he has the Brit accent. And Morby is the fuse-replacing vampire mous reviving Nobel winner.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:02 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     So here’s Milo, who is Matt Smith, Morby’s fuse-replacing friend. Or, I don’t know, maybe Morb replaced the fuse? I have no idea.

     Dr. Nichols is here, looking exactly the same age as he did 25 years ago.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:02 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     "Let’s go for a walk" and they’re suddenly surrounded by thousands of people on the streets of New York, a complete and bizarre tonal shift.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:03 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And while they’re distracted, Vampire Mouse has come back to life. oooohhhkaaaay

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:03 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     A classic bit where people insult Morby in a foreign language (Russian) and he replies to them in the same language.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:04 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now an emergency with a child Morby is treating, Anna. They put her into a medically-induced coma.

     Clearly Morby has learned the lesson that you pay attention to beeping machines. No fuse replacement needed.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:05 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now a mouse is getting injected with something. So he’s mixing bat and human DNA and putting it in a mouse? Mixing bat and mouse DNA?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:05 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     The mouse looks distressed and dies, Morby looks distressed, but doesn’t.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:06 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     A computer display helpfully tells us that the "chimera cells" are stable.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:07 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Now a bat prop is being dissected.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:07 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morby doing a good mad scientist act, "we have to push the boundaries, take the risks!"

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:08 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     lmao, so Morby is secretly "mixing human DNA with bat DNA"

     wtaf

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:08 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And he has a giant cylindrical tank filled with hundreds of bats in his office.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:09 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Morbius likes to make origami animals, in the way I’m sure is going to come back in the last act.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:10 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     And now we're in New York, and... have I mixed up who's Micheal and who's Lucien? And one of them calls the other Milo for some reason? I have no idea who anybody is.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:10 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Okay, Leto is Michael Morbius and got the Nobel, but dissed the King of Sweden for some reason.

     The other kid just vanished, presumably to hone his fuse-replacing skills.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:11 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Then another smash cut, to some undefined time period, when Michael (whose last name is Morbius) has successfully pivoted from replacing fuses to being the world's foremost expert on bloodborne illness, and has invented True Blood.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:11 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     He is so famous that he wins the Nobel Prize, and of course Dr. Nichols emcees the ceremony, and adult Lucien is there, becrutched and cranky.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:12 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Then he smacks one hooligan with a crutch and gets a beatdown.

     Then the Dr. Nichols (the hospital director, played by Jared Harris) turns up to rescue him.

     Then a cut back to him talking to Michael about going away??

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:13 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     But it impresses the hospital director, who lavishes praise on Michael for bypassing an important safety device. "You have a gift, Michael."

     No mention of the nurses who failed to respond to Lucien flatlining two seconds after walking in the door.

     Hospital director is so impressed that he sends Michael away, to better develop his fuse-replacing skills.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:13 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Michael promises to find a cure for whatever completely different diseases ail them, in a letter, which conveniently blows right out the window and into the hands of the teen hooligans, who laugh at it and play keepaway while Lucien hollers PLEASE

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:14 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Lucien (young Leto) collapses, and nobody comes to look at the beeping machine to which he is connected. Fortunately, the terminally ill child in the bed next door knows how fuses work, and pulls a blown one from the machine and replaces it with a pen spring. That's not safe!

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:15 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Young Leto has a strong British accent which old Leto utterly lacks.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:15 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     They're in a children's hospital, and teen hooligans are outside the window hollering "look at the freaks!" even though nobody is remotely visible from their vantage point.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:16 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Leto is dressed in a black cape and has two crutches, in a way designed to let the director talk at length in the commentary track about how they tried to make him very batlike.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:16 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Leto cuts his hand and bats freak out and fly everywhere.

     Smash cut to a 25-year-ago flashback, where we recognize the young Leto because he still has two crutches.

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:17 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Jared Leto has convinced a guy with a helicopter to land on a CG mountain so he can set a trap for vampire bats, I guess?

   • Maybe it's Eyesaline (ieure@mastodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 12-Jun-2022 16:07:18 UTC Maybe it's Eyesaline

     in reply to

     Am I livetooting this? I think I'm livetooting this.