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1. Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Saturday, 13-Oct-2018 19:49:19 UTC Johnny Null
   Yesterday I came to realize that my thoughtless mouth can be more cruel than I realized.
   
   I ruined my marriage.
   
   Thankfully I'm working on myself and getting help, which is leading to a second chance.
   
   I feel like utter dog shit and elated at once.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Saturday, 13-Oct-2018 20:31:39 UTC Johnny Null

     • cobra2
     @cobra2 You're welcome. I need to be as blunt and frank about myself as I would be with others.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Saturday, 13-Oct-2018 20:51:03 UTC Johnny Null

     • cobra2
     @cobra2 I'm pretty good with respect overall. I do have an issue with cops and authority in general, but I think that's earned.
     
     I spout off my mouth more than I realized, and with less restraint than I thought.
     
     I also am overly analytical and have troubles with emotions at times.
     
     There's apparently also an overload issue, but I don't understand anything much about it.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Saturday, 13-Oct-2018 21:47:49 UTC Johnny Null

     • cobra2
     @cobra2 My therapist seems to have had some new insight. I'm half expecting that to be a new diagnosis.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 14-Oct-2018 16:23:18 UTC Johnny Null

     • x1101
     @x1101 I don't know how sincere I was with that (semi) joke.
     
     He feels very strongly that I have ADHD. But for me it's almost exclusively impulse control. Though there's an overwhelm/shutting down issue too.
     
     Impulse control I know I can handle now that I'm aware of it. Not saying I'll never fuck up, of course.
     
     The shutting down thing is weird. It's a more physical thing. Though I can tell you as a fact that if I'm confronted with an attacker with a knife, I am calm and can take care of business. But more the grind of life I guess? Emotional trauma? I just don't know this part yet.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 14-Oct-2018 16:24:07 UTC Johnny Null

     • x1101
     • Thaj Sara
     @x1101 Thank you very much for the support. I've not forgotten it during this past year. /cc @thaj
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 14-Oct-2018 18:42:29 UTC Johnny Null

     • x1101
     @x1101 Oh, totally. I was just stating, not beating myself up.
     
     I'm more analytical than most, which is part of my emotional detach at times.
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 14-Oct-2018 18:44:44 UTC Johnny Null

     in reply to

     • x1101
     @x1101 But I also do beat up on myself and hold myself to standards others don't for themselves. So that contradicts my last dent.
     #peoplingIsHard
   • Johnny Null (johnnynull@freezepeach.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 14-Oct-2018 21:52:48 UTC Johnny Null

     • x1101
     @sim @x1101 Yeah, I've said that I feel like I'm deconstructing my personality's DNA.